Today as I write here in Australia, it is AFL Grand Final day – a huge day for Melbourne. For us, personally, it is 6 months to the day since our beautiful baby girl, Lily, passed away. Yesterday, I took the day off and had a fantastic day at the Reach Foundation Ladies Lunch – a special pre-Grand Final lunch to celebrate women. It was fantastic to support a great charity that helps young people get the most out of life. It was a huge amount of fun and an inspiration for our own fund raising activities.
When I started writing this blog, I knew that this post was going to be the hardest to write: recalling the day my waters unexpectedly broke. Subconsciously I think I’ve been dreading it, knowing that I would have to detail the toughest day Pete and I have ever experienced. However, in order to fully share our story it is important that I revisit it, document it, and by doing so draw a line underneath it.
As mentioned last week, Thursday 17 July was Lily’s due date. Weeks ago we decided to take this day off work and celebrate her life and the precious time we spent with her. It was an emotional but very special day which I’ll talk more about in a later blog post.
Those who have seen me recently know how exhausted I am. I am completely drained and my emotions feel like they’re balancing on a knife edge – the slightest thing can put me in tears. I’ve had to protect myself by keeping my guard up, and some days needed to keep to myself, but have found this near impossible with work and our normal social outings.
As I left you in my last blog post, it was early January; we had passed 12 weeks and were extremely excited about the impending arrival of our first child.
In February I turned 30 and to celebrate Pete organised a night out with friends in the city: eating good food, laughing the night away and for the first time in my, and a number of pregnant friends adult lives, sticking strictly to ‘mocktails’ and waking up the next day feeling fresh! Excitement was growing as our bellies got bigger and I looked forward to the day where we could celebrate and watch our children grow up together as well as support each other through our ‘Readymade Mother’s Group’ (I was 1 of 12 in our extended friendship group, and 1 of 17 women at work who were pregnant).